Sunday, November 20, 2011

Rules of Constipation!

This book... was not that great... just letting you know now. I was not a fan at all. This is the last review that I am posting that's on GoodReads. I swear, this will not happen again. I will try to post as soon as I can about those other things I mentioned. In the mean time, enjoy this review of Rules of Attraction by Simon Elkeles.

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Bah... this was just a horrible read. It was the same as PC and I just wanted to hang myself by the time it was over.


Let's see... where to start? I want to make it clear that I didn't completely HATE this book. I was mildly entertain throughout the entire thing which is why I continued the book all the way to the end. However, that doesn't change the fact that I found this book highly disappointing. Where Perfect Chemistry, though a very cliché story about two people who are completely different falling in love with each other, still had some elements that made the book a decent read, maybe not a great read but definitely a decent one, Rules of Attraction was no such book. It took everything Perfect Chemistry was, completely rehashed it, and spat it out to be something that's completely half-assed. If it actually TRIED to be its own unique story, I'm sure it would have been a decent read as well. But no. It's the EXACT same story just told through "other" characters. I was greatly disappointed to see myself reading the same book. Well, enough about that. Let's break this sucker down into the good and the bad.

How about the writing? Was it any good? Yes. It was very good. I don't doubt Simone Elkeles as being a fantastic writer. I enjoy her style quite a bit actually. She knows how to capture a reader's attention from the get-go. Her words flow so smoothly from one scene to the next. I must say that, for those of you who don't know me, I'm a huge fan of transition. Nothing makes me more happy than seeing an author who knows to go from one scene to another without making it seem like the reader missed an entire paragraph of text. So when I came across Simone's books and saw that she knew how to properly show transition, I peed my pants! I was that happy! X3 And that's not the only thing she knows how to do! I know she can tell a story that's suspenseful and intense as well. When I was reading Perfect Chemistry, I was really engaged in the story. Even though it's a story that had been told before, she wrote it in such a way that kept the reader excited to continue on all the way to the end. My only problem with Elkeles is that she was saying the same story all over again with very similar characters. Look, I'm glad that PC went well for her. Really, I am. But does that really give her an excuse to use the same story to gain an even bigger fanbase? Couldn't she be a little more creative than that? Just a little more originality is all I ask for! Another thing that bother me about her book this time around was the fact it included both Alex and Brittany. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate them, but I did feel there were in this book a little TOO much. This is supposed to be Carlos and Kiara's story. Alex and Brittany have no reason to be here. Their story is over and done with. They don't need to be hogging up anymore the spotlight. And that little thing with them at the end of the book? What the hell? What was up with that? It's like Alex did a complete 180 back to his roots in the beginning of PC. It was stupid and unnecessary. *Rolls eyes*

And if that wasn't bad enough, she uses similar characters in RoA that she had in PC. *Groans* The only difference with the characters is that they were more obnoxious in this book than they were in the previous one. You have Carlos, the male lead, who was exactly like Alex from PC... EXCEPT HE WAS MORE OF A DOUCHE!!! There was nothing likable about him at all. Anyone who cares deeply about him and only want the best for him, he treats like crap, saying how he can't get close to anyone because he is a bad person. A rebel. A guy who needs no love because he's a "gangbanger." *Scoffs* He's more of a pussy than anything else if you ask me. The worst attitude I have ever seen on a character. Oh, and did I mention he treats women like sluts? Even after he admits to "loving" Kiara, female lead, he still treats her like shit. AND HERE'S THE WORSE PART!!! Kiara bloody accepts that. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? Why she puts up with his bullshit? Oh, because she loves him. It doesn't matter if she gave up her virginity to him to show him how much she cares and to keep him with her forever, which is a very stupid move on her part (no matter how much you like a guy, if he treats you like shit, you don't sleep with him to keep him closer), or the fact Kiara says to him that she doesn't care if he wants nothing with her because she's completely fine with giving herself up for him if it means he'll hold her for a little while... do you hear this bullshit? What kind of weak-willed, male-dependent, little cunt spews out this crap and expects people to take her seriously? It's a shame that most girls think this way. Also, it's a shame because I actually liked Kiara in the beginning. She was tough, didn't care about her appearance (although, she did cared a lot of what others thought about her...), and wasn't your typical girl. But, lo and behold, as soon as a penis comes into the picture (and a loser on top of that), she becomes like ever other female YA protagonist out there. This upsets me to no end. I want to finally see a girl stand up for herself the way she's supposed to. Not throw it out the window as soon as a man comes along. (AND A LOSER ON TOP OF THAT!!!) Jesus, it makes me feel such shame considering I, too, am female. *Sighs and shakes her head* Oh well... what can one do? EXCEPT BITCH AND RAGE ABOUT THE STUPIDITY OF THESE BLOODY CHARACTERS!!! *Snarls* Carlos and Kiara need to be hit by a freaking bulldozer. -_-""""""

Okay, I ranted enough. Time to talk about the good characters in this book. (This might not take long at all... there's really not that many.) I liked Kiara's family. Every single one of them. (Shame they had a shitty daughter.) I really enjoyed Brandon, Kiara's younger brother. He was cute, sweet, and very energetic... if a bit gullible. But, hey, he's six-years-old. I can cut him some slack... for now. *Narrows eyes* I also liked Collen, Kiara's mother. Her "health-freak" mannerisms is something I can relate to and I think anyone who promotes healthy eating is awesome in my book... even if they are a bit irresponsible (more on that in a second). Westford, Kiara's father, was a Super Daddy! He's strong, brave, sweet, kind, caring, loving, understandable, laid-back, and just plain old awesome! He was one of the few who tried to get Carlos to see that not everything is out to get him. He also told him to man up and quit being a pansy... just not in so many words. XD In any case, I really like the daddy. However, I did feel Kiara's parents where a little irresponsible. The fact that they let a total stranger into their house when they clearly know that they have a teenage daughter, don't keep an eye on them, allow them to be alone, and then expect that they don't fool around? Man, those are some pretty poor excuses for parents. Not to mention the rules they have. Okay, some of them are quite good. Like no taking drugs or drinking. But the curfews? Midnight on weekdays and two in the morning on weekends? Shit, I'm lucky if I'm aloud to go out for an hour with someone I barely even know, and even if I was allowed, it'll be around three P.M. I would have to be home by four P.M. the latest! I don't know... it just seems pretty unrealistic to me. As much as I love Kiara's folks, they really are doing a bad job in parenting. *Shrugs*

Yay! We've come to the part I was looking forward to the most!!! Talking about Tuck!!! (God, I love him!) Tuck is Kiara's gay best friend. (By the way, am I the only one who hates the fact that only the girls in YA literature get to have a gay best friend? Why can't the males have a gay best friend? Just because they have a friend that's gay doesn't make them gay. What kind of mentality is that anyway? We live in 20fucking11! Time to get over this whole "I'm too much of a man to wear pink" and get over yourselves! I demand to see a guy with a gay best friend right now!!!) *Ahem* Anyway, Tuck is one (if not only) of the best characters in this entire book! He's so hilarious! Every seen he is in made me crack up! I was always depressed to see him leave because he was, literally, the only character that didn't make me want to slap him upside the head. Even though I liked Kiara's parents, they still did things that made me want to whip out my mallet and bang them with it. Not Tuck, though! Tuck had a great sense of humor, never let anyone get the better of him, and didn't give two shits about what people thought of him. He was truly hardcore and he was a very good friend to Kiara. (Something she wasn't very much of to him but I digress.) He was there to support her even if he though Carlos was a douche. (And the hell he used to give Carlos was the highlight of the book! <3) Oh, man... I cannot say enough good things about his character. He was just... wonderful and amazing! Hell, I would like to read a book about him! I'm sure it would be a lot more entertaining than the crap I just finished reading. In fact, where does Alex Strong live? He's the inspiration for Tuck! Alex, I demand to see you right now so I can gush all over you. Yes, it IS as nasty as it sounds. *Smirks*

Alright, let's wrap this baby up. The book was... eh, okay. It's not a great read. It's not even a decent read. But it is okay. If you're curious enough, I suggest checking this one out of the library first before you buy it. It was very disappointing seeing as how it's the same old story about a boy who's in a gang that falls in love with a rich girl and they have the nasties together. I guess if you love PC, you'll love RoA. If that wasn't your favorite pastry then I say skip it... wait, it's actually worth the read! If only for Tuck! He's too awesome to pass up! *Slaps self* Well, not that the fangirl has been killed, I'll say this. Give it a try but only if you are curious enough. If not, forget it. I read the preview of Chain Reaction that came with my copy of RoA and let just tell you... it's the same story AGAIN with similar male characters AGAIN with a pathetic excuse of a female protagonist AGAIN! It's just... no. Elkeles, I am very disappointed in you. I know you can do better than this nonsense. Please, just try a little harder and then things might actual go well between you and I. You have the potential. Now just get to it! Anyway, that's all from me for now. I'll be coming very soon with another review for you. Stay tuned~ *Cue musical outro*

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